I have decided that TUESDAY is a great day to begin anew with the diet. Most people take the weekend to eat like the proverbial cow, but I picked the last two months.
For whatever reasons (which go in cycles and, I'm sure, have something to do with my sense of self worth) I gain weight at alarming rates, thereby proving to myself that yes indeed, I'm a fat ugly cow who deserves no love or respect.
BAH. FEH. FIE on't. Tuesday is the day, because it isn't possible to get any fatter. And I will do it by eating healthfully.
Do you hear, O Gods of Anorexia and Media Expectations? I will vanquish thee, bring the unholy demons of high cholesterol and blood pressure to bay and finally to ruin with the almighty book of South Beach.
Beware, ask not for whom the broccoli tolls, it tolls for thee!
Monday, September 26, 2005
Thursday, September 22, 2005
childish equinox...
We embark again upon a day of equal light and dark, just after harvest, and before the thinnest veil descends (and I go to Portland) and we all celebrate the best holiday ever.
What it really means is the we'll set the clocks back soon, and most of us will get an extra hour's sleep. Though it probably all comes out in the wash, what with the ability to stay up an hour later.
And speaking of Hallowe'en, I miss trick or treating. Those of us who are unable to grow up, or are simply holding on to our inner child with fingernails and teeth, still dress up, but can't quite make the leap into the breach of seriously acting like a child. Not only would we get weird and hostile looks from other adults too jealous of our childlike wonder and bellowing deep voices at the door, but we're now so concerned with perception that we stifle every imaginative impulse.
Recently I was at an off-site meeting where the final activity (after listening to stone-boring lectures on process that mean absolutely nothing to those of us who actually DO the work) was brainstorming about the year's Halloween party. Needless to say, the conceptual parody of the work environment won out over cooler ideas like "Impossibly Scary", and "Halloween Holiday Mash-Up". You'd think that a pack of designers would have more imaginative things to think of, but the adults won out. Adults are so BORING. In fact, the whole idea was tailored to those who refuse to dress up. Just come as you are, since you use your imaginations every day, we couldn't possibly ask any more of you.
So it all comes down to my impatience with people who won't play. We should all take the time to play more. Get out those crayons, color outside the lines, refuse to know the meanings of terms like: off-line, out-of-the-box, and synergy. Refuse to have smoke blown in our faces, wonder at the loveliness of being able to dress up, get high on nothing but sugar, and be someone else so the boogey men don't get us.
What it really means is the we'll set the clocks back soon, and most of us will get an extra hour's sleep. Though it probably all comes out in the wash, what with the ability to stay up an hour later.
And speaking of Hallowe'en, I miss trick or treating. Those of us who are unable to grow up, or are simply holding on to our inner child with fingernails and teeth, still dress up, but can't quite make the leap into the breach of seriously acting like a child. Not only would we get weird and hostile looks from other adults too jealous of our childlike wonder and bellowing deep voices at the door, but we're now so concerned with perception that we stifle every imaginative impulse.
Recently I was at an off-site meeting where the final activity (after listening to stone-boring lectures on process that mean absolutely nothing to those of us who actually DO the work) was brainstorming about the year's Halloween party. Needless to say, the conceptual parody of the work environment won out over cooler ideas like "Impossibly Scary", and "Halloween Holiday Mash-Up". You'd think that a pack of designers would have more imaginative things to think of, but the adults won out. Adults are so BORING. In fact, the whole idea was tailored to those who refuse to dress up. Just come as you are, since you use your imaginations every day, we couldn't possibly ask any more of you.
So it all comes down to my impatience with people who won't play. We should all take the time to play more. Get out those crayons, color outside the lines, refuse to know the meanings of terms like: off-line, out-of-the-box, and synergy. Refuse to have smoke blown in our faces, wonder at the loveliness of being able to dress up, get high on nothing but sugar, and be someone else so the boogey men don't get us.
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